2007 - Page 3 of 5 - Bitness.com

My Career in Porn

Editorial

Reading Time: < 1 minute

A few years ago I did what any self-absorbed person with a laptop and a little time to kill would do – I googled my full name (in double quotes mind you, to prevent all the Warren Zevon matches with Lawrence somewhere in the page).

Imagine my surprise when I discovered I starred in a porno called “Torrid” in 1989 with April West. College was great, but damn – I think I would have remembered this! There’s not a whole lot of us Zevon’s and I’m fairly certain I’m the one and only Lawrence Zevon.

A little more digging revealed that Rame.net, the self-appointed “Home of Civilized Smut,” had simply made a typo (actual actor was Lawrence Zenon). I suppose I could get them to correct it, but it’s pretty damn funny and that little something extra I can put in my resume to stand out from all the wanna be fluffers out there.

Why would I put this on Bitness? What in the world does this have to do with fitness OR gadgets? Well other than the aforementioned self-absorbed bit, my scene would have burned anywhere from 10-40 calories. Although I never saw it, there’s a good chance some kind of gadget was involved as well 🙂

Somehow I don’t think this is what Grandpa had in mind when he said he could picture the name Zevon in lights one day.

May 22, 2007/2 Comments/by lzevon

Garmin offers Mac OS X PIO Loader, updater

Cycling, General Fitness, Running, Trekking

Reading Time: < 1 minute

Garmin has released new beta versions of its POI loader and Unit Software Updater, enabling Garmin GPS (Global Positioning System) users to download and install software updates using a Mac and a USB connection. The POI (Point Of Interest) Loader for Mac 2.0.0.1 Beta allows users to load custom points of interest into a GPS unit, accepting input files downloaded from the internet or created custom. Users can configure the unit to produce alerts when they are within a certain distance of a point or are driving over a certain speed near any given point to warn about upcoming school zones, red lights, and speed cameras. POI Loader for Mac 2.0.0.1 Beta is available as a free download, requiring Mac OS X 10.4 or later.

Source: macnn

May 16, 2007/1 Comment/by lzevon

Biased Book Review: I’ll Sleep When I’m Dead

Editorial

Reading Time: 2 minutes

I remember visiting my cousin Warren Zevon backstage at concerts, usually in the green room with the names of other artists scrawled on the walls and ceiling. His manager would prevent fans from disturbing us while we enjoyed this family time. With most of our family living on the East coast, Warren’s concert schedule in New York, Boston and Rhode Island always included family coming to visit. There were very few opportunities other than his concerts to get together, so this is where our stories and pictures were shared.

Warren passed away a few years ago and after he did we connected with his daughter Ariel, her husband Ben, sons Max and Gus (the coolest twins ever) and ex-wife (and Warren’s close confidant) Crystal Zevon. Warren would have liked that we now have each other – most importantly our kids – in our lives. We don’t spend as much time together as we’d like, but we have email and Google Chat!

In a few weeks we will be together at a benefit concert Jackson Browne is giving to raise money for the local agricultural community exchange (LACE) in Barre, Vermont. LACE is Ariel’s passionate effort to bring locally grown foods back to the community, to support local growers, farmers and businesses, as well as help people eat healthier.

Crystal’s passionate work is the recently released book Warren asked her to write, I’ll Sleep When I’m Dead: The Dirty Life and Times of Warren Zevon. An honest look at Warren’s life (sometimes painfully honest – not exactly the conversations we had back stage), the book tells the story of Warren’s life from those who knew him best. I’m not done reading the book, but I can say that it is very interesting, well written and worth picking up a copy.

It’s a perfect Summer read because the chapters are broken-down with bite-size entries. If you have to put it down, jump in the waves and help dig a moat around the sandcastle, you can easily pick-up where you left off. It’s this same writing structure that has you convinced you can read the next bit and the next (and the next) and before you know it it’s 1:30 in the morning and your day begins in 5 hours!

May 14, 2007/3 Comments/by lzevon

Limping into the Sunset…

Cycling, Editorial, Running

Reading Time: 2 minutes

I don’t like to talk about it, but the Fit Geek went down with a knee injury. I haven’t had an official diagnosis, but Dr. Internet and friends lead me to believe I have bursitis or Patella Tendinitis. I took about 3 weeks off and there was no more pain. I started with some 2 milers at a modest pace and wearing a neoprene knee brace.

After a week or so I bumped-up to 3.5 miles, wearing the knee brace and following my runs with stretching, icing the knee and then rubbing in camphor oil after a hot shower. Moderate pain but far so I’ve been able to keep an every other day schedule.

I’ve since run a few 5 milers and despite the brace and the ritual, I noticed an increase in pain (I should probably see a doctor about this). In addition to my knee, there is the question of what the hell is going on with my heart rate? I’m admittedly an anxious person by nature and I get amped to go running through the woods. Maybe the excitement of the run and the nature of my being are contributing to the following…

My resting heart rate is about 70bpm at this stage of my season and hopefully to about 60bpm by the Summer with continued running and occasional biking – this has been the case for the last few years. I never ran with a heart rate monitor before this year (I use the Garmin Forerunner 305) and for all I know this is how my heart has been all along? Before I run my heart rate is up around 100! Thirty seconds into my run I’m up to 150! For my age (I was 39 May 11) my maximum HR is ~180, so before I literally start my run I’m approaching my max and at the high end of my target range- very discouraging.

I’m keeping my eye on this closely and collecting data to bring to a cardiologist. More than ever I feel like I need the release to just go running as hard as I want but between the knee and the HR I can’t. I thought falling apart was a year off but apparently I’m getting a head start?

May 14, 2007/3 Comments/by lzevon

Looking for Time

Editorial

Reading Time: 2 minutes

I can’t tell you how much the emails, phone calls and even the Western Union telegram I received – inquiring about when the next Bitness posting will occur- have meant to me. My loyal readers are obviously in need of a Bitness fix. Before I can satisfy your yen for all things geek and tech, let me bring you up-to-date on the following weeks (since my last real post).

I have been juggling a wife, 2 kids, work, 4 freelance jobs, a vacation, 2 house building (cedar closet in progress, shelves to the right) projects (cedar closet became a club – gear needs a new home), Spring clean-up, bum knee and video to DVD archiving project (Sony RDR-VX555 – get it).

Queue the violins…
About the vacation/cruise. We missed the ship in Miami due to the Nor-Easter on 16-April. We flew to Miami, stayed overnight and caught the boat in Nassau the following day. That alone was a general disappointment and pain in the ass, but when you factor in the cab dropping us at the wrong hotel (and walking to the ‘nearby’ hotel dragging luggage), being assigned an uncleaned room, having my wallet stolen from the front desk of the hotel, having to cancel all the credit cards and put fraud protection on my credit… well you get the picture. Searching through garbage pails until past midnight and again at 5am in the morning was somehow not the vacation I imagined.

Cruising was an interesting experience. I think I might be one of the few people who actually lost weight on the cruise! Watching some of those people eat made us feel full – absolute gluttony. We made the most of it however and the wife even agreed to go para-sailing (here’s another)!

Hopefully after things settle down I’ll have time to dedicate to Bitness. In the interim I have been scoping out new topics and as always welcome your suggestions. Please stay tuned…

April 30, 2007/2 Comments/by lzevon

King of the Beat

Reading Time: < 1 minute

I don’t like to admit this, but in the deep dark recesses of my past life I used to break-dance. Baby swipes, knee spins, the worm, back spins – hell, even a little popping and locking – talk about a workout. No one could pretend swallow a foes head and throw it back up like I could.

But me and my partner never had skills like this, we couldn’t even windmill. One thing is sure, doing the worm in your thirties is dangerous business (unless you’re a bat-wolf), I nutted myself so bad a few years ago I quit cold turkey.

Give it up for the little people keeping it real in this big, big world…

April 12, 2007/0 Comments/by lzevon

Softrucks: Skate to Live

Boarding

Reading Time: < 1 minute

Softrucks are so simple yet so clever that I kick myself for not thinking of them myself. Molded from TPU urethane (the same material used to make wheels), Softrucks are similar to the shape of a skateboard’s trucks and wheels and set at the same height. They mount to any skateboard deck using the provided hardware.

A deck with Softrucks feels identical to a regular deck only you ain’t going anywhere. Well, check that… maybe UP if you have the skills. They offer some good pop and don’t roll so practicing ollies, flips, shuvits, etc is easier and usually safer than on a ‘live’ deck. Once you can do a trick with Softrucks you’re virtually assured you can stomp it on wheels.

So here I am in my slippers, trying a heel flip and thinking the yacht, mansion, parties with Puffy and hanging out in the grotto with Heff’s girls will have to wait with the hopes I think of something so brilliant the next time…

Softrucks will run you about USD $25.00. Go out and get yourself some.

April 8, 2007/1 Comment/by lzevon

Keep Them Doggies Rolling

Reading Time: 2 minutes

The Dog Powered Scooter just might be an alternate mode of transportation for those lucky enough to have a job where the pooch can come to work. Imagine the faces on those suckers stopped in traffic, while you slip past on your Dog Powered Scooter sipping an organic soy latte – pure Milk Bone-generated power.

Reported to be a combination of adrenalin, pleasure and exercise, the Dog Powered Scooter only needs a few kicks to get going, a pocket full of treats and one tongue-flapping dog. A reviewer measured his dog pulling 175 pounds at just 4-7 pounds of resistance. The dog I see dragging some lady around my block (sans-scooter) is easily pulling 25 times that and at a pretty good clip!

I admit, I’m intrigued. Problem is I don’t have a dog and while my 3-year-old daughter Elli would most likely be up for it, I’m making nice with the Bernese Mountain Dog across the street. For those of you with dogs, keep close tabs on them as gas prices increase or better yet, get the Globalpetfinder.

But what’s up with the lame product name? To be fair the Scootch was not an option and the Pooter is an even worse and might I say significantly off-color portmanteau. But certainly there is something more creative than ‘Dog Powered Scooter.’ I leave it to Bitness readers to come up with a new name in the comments. I see the Web stats people, I know you’re ‘here’ but let me ‘hear’ you. Best suggestion wins a Milk Bone.

April 2, 2007/4 Comments/by lzevon

Flip-out your Workout

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Back in the day (oh, right around 400 BC), Hippocrates , the Father of Medicine (and namesake of the oath doctors take that, among other things, keeps you’re hemorrhoids personal and not the cause of raucous laughter at the country club) started hanging people upside down to relieve back pain. Well, that and he probably thought it was pretty funny that people trusted him to do weird shit in the off chance they might feel better.

One Messiah and a whole bunch of Simpson’s episodes later, people are still hanging themselves upside down for stress and back pain relief. Just today my friend told me he was giving inversion therapy a try at the suggestion of someone who recently underwent back surgery.

Inversion therapy seems to be on an upswing, I’m not sure we’ve seen such uptake since 451 AD when Attila the Hun’s army of half a million men got an ass kicking in the battle of Chalons from the tag-team efforts of the Visigoths and Romans. It’s said that after this battle, Attila’s army just hung out, probably upside down, before deciding to go right-side up and invade Italy.

Inversion therapy is supposed to increase spaces between your spine’s vertebrae. If you lead an active lifestyle you’ve probably done a good job thumping and jarring your back and have that tight compressed feeling. Stretching feels great but a quicker method is to put gravity to use and get inverted. The verdict is out if inversion actually increases vertebrae spacing, but if it feels good and provides relief who cares?

Caution: Before you try, wear pants, empty out your pockets and take the sand out of your shoes. Seriously, if you have hypertension or heart disease you should probably keep upright. Anyone with pre-existing conditions should consult a doctor before trying any new therapy or workout regimen.

Where to buy: A decent inversion table can cost anywhere between $200-$500. Check Froogle for side-by-side pricing and consider the following:

Capacity (how much weight can it hold)
Table weight
Gravity Boots
Folding (storage considerations)
Price
Warranty

March 25, 2007/0 Comments/by lzevon

The CrossTrainer Four Minute Workout

Cycling, General Fitness, Running

Reading Time: 2 minutes

The people at ROM stand-by their claim that 4 minutes a day on their CrossTrainer is all you need to stay in peak cardiovascular shape. A ‘lengthy technical explanation’ backs up this claim, but if you’re stubborn and still don’t believe them just have a read through all their marketing pain points. Whereas most companies would address these points behind the scenes and present you with cleverly written copy and glossy images, ROM lays it all out there in a flourish of humility.

The ROM will last 80,000 uses – that’s 219 years (the warranty will only get you 5-10 however, hmmm). ROM does the new math and came up with 250. In fairness they only recommend 4 days a week (equal to 15 minutes) but for $14,615 – I intend to get my money’s worth. After I re-mortgage my house and get one of these babies I’ll be breathing all the 60mlO2/kg/min that you no longer need because you already died… 130 years ago. I better get two so I can put the other in my vacation home on Mars.

Judging by their Web site, it doesn’t look like ROM has moved many CrossTrainers. Surely people have accepted their findings and were willing to lay down their $14,615 right? Can’t we raise enough money to buy ROM a paragraph break? No, my bad, it turns out those long paragraphs are an insanely clever intimidation tactic to dissuade the visitor from actually reading – pure brilliance.

If I only had 4 minutes for a workout, then clearly I don’t have time to read the Web site. But I suffered through it for you, my loyal readers who don’t have 1 minute to leave a comment (yeah, I said it).

I don’t claim to be an expert, just a guy with no particular interest to rush my workouts. I workout to relieve stress; the stress of rushing around and never having a moment to appreciate what’s around me. If you have a lot less time and a lot more money then go for it. After all the ‘described delivery/installation process goes very smoothly 85% of the time.’

March 20, 2007/1 Comment/by lzevon

Light – Action – Camera!

Boarding, Climbing, Cycling, Running, Trekking

Reading Time: 2 minutes

When I was younger my oldest brother Paul made a series of movies with my father’s 8mm (film). He remade Airport 1975, complete with the crash scene (planes with straws glued on them and strung-up in the garage). I was cast in the role of Sam, the Jerry Stiller character who sleeps through all the action. Dressed in my suit I leaned-up against the rakes while the other kids ‘acted.’

Probably one of the funniest things Paul ever shot was a video from our dog Reggie’s perspective, running through the house with the camera at knee level. Something about that movie cracked me up and I watched it over and over. I like first person (or dog) point of view film making, which is why I want the ATC2K Waterproof Action Camera from Oregon Scientific.

Attach it to the handlebars of your bike or strap it to your helmet and capture digital video in 640 X 480 VGA (standard NTSC) at 30 frames per second to an internal SDA card. The ATC2K comes with accessories that allow you to strap it to other gear as well, a windsurfer perhaps, it is waterproof up to 10 feet! The ATC2K is also shock resistant, takes only 2 AA batteries to run (lithium batteries recommended for cold environments) and measures 4.25L x 1.75D x 2.25H (in).

Although currently out of stock, the ATC2K can soothe your inner Spielberg for only USD $129.99. You can request to be notified when they become available, but for now start planning and storyboard your next glade run, wipe-out, downhill attack, Eskimo roll, rappel or simply strap it to the dog for a good laugh.

March 12, 2007/2 Comments/by lzevon

How You Hanging?

Boarding

Reading Time: < 1 minute

I have a friend who fancies himself a big air specialist on a wakeboard and snowboard. Truth be told he’s barely off the ground, but my friends and I humor him. The AirPod from Johnson Outdoors can track how many jumps you do in a run or in a day and the height of those jumps. You can even track a ‘lifetime’ of airs in this device.

The Airpod sells for about $70 and is also a stopwatch, provides temperature information, time and date and alarms. It would be cool if they integrated an MP3 player into the AirPod. As it is I’m usually carrying around a snickers bar, mp3 player, wallet, glasses, goggles, trail map, cell phone and the disappointment of riding like a sliver of my former self 😉

I wouldn’t normally warn anyone before a link, Bitness is a family friendly site after all. However, when you link to AirPod be prepared for the most annoying Web site ever created! It’s an absolutely torturous experience I wouldn’t wish on my own worst enemy (George Bush).

Go Big!

March 6, 2007/2 Comments/by lzevon

Old Fashioned Workout: Skate, Mosh, Repeat

Reading Time: 2 minutes

In high school I was a skate punk. I rode everywhere and on everything with my bestest bud Jason. We would meet a growing number of skaters every weekend at a fountain in downtown White Plains, waiting for us to show them our turf. I weighed about 135 pounds.

As part of the skate culture we started listening to New York hardcore bands. We often went to the world famous CBGBs in NYC, or a place called The Anthrax in Norwalk, CT. Our friend Drago played the drums in Breakdown (later Killing Time/Raw Deal) and getting up on stage to huck ourselves into the crowd was easy and then we would mosh like mad men.

Between skating and moshing it was non-stop exercise and I had probably less than 6 percent body fat. I was teased for being so skinny, but damn I was fit too. Everything about my lifestyle was movement. I never needed to ‘work’ to exercise.

Now I’m 38, hung up my Doc Martins years ago and only skate to follow my oldest daughter on her Razor Scooter around the neighborhood. More traditional forms of exercise keep me under 175 and while I can’t say I enjoy it as much, I do like the way it makes me feel. Especially when I’m listening to Wall of Hate blasting on my iPod.

March 3, 2007/0 Comments/by lzevon