Rants, raves and other off topic nonsense.

Reading Time: < 1 minute

A few years ago I did what any self-absorbed person with a laptop and a little time to kill would do – I googled my full name (in double quotes mind you, to prevent all the Warren Zevon matches with Lawrence somewhere in the page).

TorridImagine my surprise when I discovered I starred in a porno called “Torrid” in 1989 with April West. College was great, but damn – I think I would have remembered this! There’s not a whole lot of us Zevon’s and I’m fairly certain I’m the one and only Lawrence Zevon.

A little more digging revealed that Rame.net, the self-appointed “Home of Civilized Smut,” had simply made a typo (actual actor was Lawrence Zenon). I suppose I could get them to correct it, but it’s pretty damn funny and that little something extra I can put in my resume to stand out from all the wanna be fluffers out there.

Why would I put this on Bitness? What in the world does this have to do with fitness OR gadgets? Well other than the aforementioned self-absorbed bit, my scene would have burned anywhere from 10-40 calories. Although I never saw it, there’s a good chance some kind of gadget was involved as well 🙂

Somehow I don’t think this is what Grandpa had in mind when he said he could picture the name Zevon in lights one day.

Reading Time: 2 minutes

I remember visiting my cousin Warren Zevon backstage at concerts, usually in the green room with the names of other artists scrawled on the walls and ceiling. His manager would prevent fans from disturbing us while we enjoyed this family time. With most of our family living on the East coast, Warren’s concert schedule in New York, Boston and Rhode Island always included family coming to visit. There were very few opportunities other than his concerts to get together, so this is where our stories and pictures were shared.

Warren passed away a few years ago and after he did we connected with his daughter Ariel, her husband Ben, sons Max and Gus (the coolest twins ever) and ex-wife (and Warren’s close confidant) Crystal Zevon. Warren would have liked that we now have each other – most importantly our kids – in our lives. We don’t spend as much time together as we’d like, but we have email and Google Chat!

In a few weeks we will be together at a benefit concert Jackson Browne is giving to raise money for the local agricultural community exchange (LACE) in Barre, Vermont. LACE is Ariel’s passionate effort to bring locally grown foods back to the community, to support local growers, farmers and businesses, as well as help people eat healthier.

Crystals BookCrystal’s passionate work is the recently released book Warren asked her to write, I’ll Sleep When I’m Dead: The Dirty Life and Times of Warren Zevon. An honest look at Warren’s life (sometimes painfully honest – not exactly the conversations we had back stage), the book tells the story of Warren’s life from those who knew him best. I’m not done reading the book, but I can say that it is very interesting, well written and worth picking up a copy.

It’s a perfect Summer read because the chapters are broken-down with bite-size entries. If you have to put it down, jump in the waves and help dig a moat around the sandcastle, you can easily pick-up where you left off. It’s this same writing structure that has you convinced you can read the next bit and the next (and the next) and before you know it it’s 1:30 in the morning and your day begins in 5 hours!

Reading Time: 2 minutes

I don’t like to talk about it, but the Fit Geek went down with a knee injury. I haven’t had an official diagnosis, but Dr. Internet and friends lead me to believe I have bursitis or Patella Tendinitis. I took about 3 weeks off and there was no more pain. I started with some 2 milers at a modest pace and wearing a neoprene knee brace.

WalkerAfter a week or so I bumped-up to 3.5 miles, wearing the knee brace and following my runs with stretching, icing the knee and then rubbing in camphor oil after a hot shower. Moderate pain but far so I’ve been able to keep an every other day schedule.

I’ve since run a few 5 milers and despite the brace and the ritual, I noticed an increase in pain (I should probably see a doctor about this). In addition to my knee, there is the question of what the hell is going on with my heart rate? I’m admittedly an anxious person by nature and I get amped to go running through the woods. Maybe the excitement of the run and the nature of my being are contributing to the following…

My resting heart rate is about 70bpm at this stage of my season and hopefully to about 60bpm by the Summer with continued running and occasional biking – this has been the case for the last few years. I never ran with a heart rate monitor before this year (I use the Garmin Forerunner 305) and for all I know this is how my heart has been all along? Before I run my heart rate is up around 100! Thirty seconds into my run I’m up to 150! For my age (I was 39 May 11) my maximum HR is ~180, so before I literally start my run I’m approaching my max and at the high end of my target range- very discouraging.

I’m keeping my eye on this closely and collecting data to bring to a cardiologist. More than ever I feel like I need the release to just go running as hard as I want but between the knee and the HR I can’t. I thought falling apart was a year off but apparently I’m getting a head start?

Reading Time: 2 minutes

I can’t tell you how much the emails, phone calls and even the Western Union telegram I received – inquiring about when the next Bitness posting will occur- have meant to me. My loyal readers are obviously in need of a Bitness fix. Before I can satisfy your yen for all things geek and tech, let me bring you up-to-date on the following weeks (since my last real post).

shelvesI have been juggling a wife, 2 kids, work, 4 freelance jobs, a vacation, 2 house building (cedar closet in progress, shelves to the right) projects (cedar closet became a club – gear needs a new home), Spring clean-up, bum knee and video to DVD archiving project (Sony RDR-VX555 – get it).

Queue the violins…
About the vacation/cruise. We missed the ship in Miami due to the Nor-Easter on 16-April. We flew to Miami, stayed overnight and caught the boat in Nassau the following day. That alone was a general disappointment and pain in the ass, but when you factor in the cab dropping us at the wrong hotel (and walking to the ‘nearby’ hotel dragging luggage), being assigned an uncleaned room, having my wallet stolen from the front desk of the hotel, having to cancel all the credit cards and put fraud protection on my credit… well you get the picture. Searching through garbage pails until past midnight and again at 5am in the morning was somehow not the vacation I imagined.

Cruising was an interesting experience. I think I might be one of the few people who actually lost weight on the cruise! Watching some of those people eat made us feel full – absolute gluttony. We made the most of it however and the wife even agreed to go para-sailing (here’s another)!

Hopefully after things settle down I’ll have time to dedicate to Bitness. In the interim I have been scoping out new topics and as always welcome your suggestions. Please stay tuned…

Reading Time: < 1 minute

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. Two Colombians, a Guatemalan and a Sri Lankan are in a homemade submarine traveling 6 feet under the ocean’s surface, breathing through plastic tubes and smuggling nearly 3 tons of cocaine…

submarine

Kent Gilbert / AP

OK, it’s not a joke, it actually happened. And it’s not the first time a home made submarine has been used to smuggle drugs and probably won’t be the last.

The plastic breathing tubes are what gave these smugglers away. I think it’s fair to ask why 4 smugglers, holed-up in a homemade sub more than 100 miles from shore, are breathing through plastic pipes? Could they not have provided a few tanks? I mean after all the trouble they went through to build a sub from wood and fiberglass and load it up with millions in gak?

Somewhere in here there’s a Kelsey Grammer Down Periscope reference but I don’t have the energy. Check out Innespace for some cool fishy like diving, jumping crafts and if you’re looking for a yacht-submarine US Submarines has some models that even the snobbiest of cocaine cowboys would enjoy. More on the gear/fitness thread in the next post… promise.

Reading Time: 2 minutes

SneezyYou probably noticed I haven’t posted in a few days. Despite my efforts to avoid germs, I’ve had the worst cold known to mankind. Actually I’ve had the cold for probably a month, but it started making it crescendo this week.

More recently, this cold has taken a toll on my brain, I can barely think and I’m always tired. The post nasal drip is absolute torture and my lordie, what will it take to get this taste out of my mouth? It’s time to break out the big guns of homeopathy with what I like to call the triangle approach to kicking a cold in the ass.

1. Jim Jay-Bones’ Lemon-Zinger “Turbo” Tea

  • 2 Green Tea teabags
  • 16oz travel mug
  • 4 tablespoons natural honey
  • Juice of 1/2 lemon
  • Water

Boil water and add to the rest of the ingredients. Let it steep for at least 5 minutes. Rinse and repeat.

2. The Sleeping Michelin Man

Take a really hot shower and then overdress for bed. Overdress to the point that rolling over is almost impossible. Wear your long johns, pajamas, sweat suit and ski suit. Chug at least one pint of spring water before nodding-off. If you have a humidifier – BLAST it. If you have more than one, blast ’em if you got ’em. If you don’t have one, buy one. Add water and enough salt to get it steaming.

3. Eat, Drink and be Wary

Even the Mayo Clinic says there’s no basis to the old wives tale that it helps to starve a cold and feed a fever. Eat like a viking and drink a lot of fluids, as much as possible and preferably vitamin-rich (OJ is great). Lay off the beer and mixed drinks because you’ll dehydrate. By this time it should be obvious that the triangle approach is about turning your body into a wet sponge.

Be wary. By that I mean be cautious; about going outside under-dressed (wear a hat), staying up too late to catch the Daily Show or subjecting yourself to undue stress (take a break).

Reading Time: < 1 minute

People who know me well… maybe even not so well… know I’m somewhat of a full-blown germaphobe. It’s not mud or dirt that bothers me. I’ve always been ‘one’ with the animals. Forever the gentleman, I’ve never felt that girls had the cooties.

It’s people. Dirty, sneeze-and-shake, piss-and-run, ass-scratching, no-hands-washing people. Oh, it’s all the rage now to open a public restroom door with your foot, but I was all elbows and knees in the early 80s! I was ridiculed by my friends and family, all who now admit I was ahead of my time.

You’re probably asking yourself, “Ok Nostradamus then what next? What grim reality for mankind looms on the horizon?”

NostradamusSo I’m here to tell you, it’s super germs. With all the anti-bacterial soap and mutating germs, terrorism and germ warfare, simply stepping on towel in the hotel shower isn’t enough.

My advice is to live as stress free as possible, exercise daily, eat right and if all else fails… get off-the-grid land in some far-flung locale, learn about sustainable living, gear-up and keep the Cipro handy.

Mainstream media will be talking about super germs and pandemics more and more and people will get increasingly freaked out. The fact is, all we can do about it is live a healthy lifestyle, take some responsibility with personal hygiene and when it comes to public restrooms; Hover, don’t Cover (though if you must, set the table – twice).

Reading Time: 2 minutes

I’m always looking for a good deal on gear. I’m not saying I buy a lot of gear (cough) but I do like to know what the going rate is for – oh I don’t know, a Metolius FatCam. Mountain Gear has them for $40, not bad but here’s the thing – I don’t even climb trad, just sport and bouldering.

Fleece Lined HackamoreSo why do I even care? I mean I cared about gear deals long before bitness.com existed, so it’s not the blog. It’s because I freakin’ love gear. I’m terrified of horses but check out the deal on this Fleece Lined Hackamore! You won’t ever find me defending my wicket – but how can I ignore the aptly named ‘hot deal’ on this pre-knocked, factory seasoned CA-Pakistan cricket bat?

One of my favorite sources for finding out about reasonably priced gear is SteepAndCheap.com, a Backcountry.com ‘powered’ site. When the clock strikes midnight, I get an email with the first deal of the day. But I don’t stop there. I also subscribe to the SAC RSS feed, so I can track when a new deal is posted. Deals are typically 60% below retail – not bad.

Other good gear sites are the aforementioned MountainGear.com, REI, Campmor and of course Overstock.com, the 500 pound gorilla of discount merchandise.

I’d like to know if anyone else knows of some good gear sites? Leave a comment with the link and description of the site so the rest of us gear freaks can get a fix.

Reading Time: 2 minutes

The Scott eVest is proof that you can put a patent on damn near anything. Dubbed a “Gear Management Solution,” the SeV promises to get your PAN together by using their TEC. Oh, you’re not hip to Personal Area Networks? What’s that? You never rocked Technology Enabled Clothing? Step up to 2001 son, it’s all about the ZIP-PIP. You feelin’ me?

The SeV is little more than clothing with a lot of pockets that have holes in them (finding keys on your person could create a new dance trend not unlike the Macarena). These pocket holes allow you to run headphones from an MP3 player to your collar, where congruous BudBuckets await.

There site doesn’t seem very recent and that’s probably because people figured out how to put holes in their pockets all by themselves, or just went and bought a Bluetooth headphones. But if you had plans to come out with your own clothing line Mr. Lagerfeld, don’t even think about it. Scott eVest has patents, patents pending, trademarks and registered trademarks for:

  • TECSeV
  • Magnetic Closures
  • BudBuckets
  • No-Bulge Pockets
  • DualAccess Pockets
  • HangingPockets
  • DeepPockets
  • All Access
  • BadgeGrabber
  • CollarConnect
  • CreditCarry
  • Detachable Cargo Cache
  • Detachable Cargo Cache +
  • HatHolder
  • MyMemory Pocket
  • ZIP-PIP

The Burton Amp from 2003 had holes and a controller built into the sleeve so you don’t have to fumble through to find your iPod, that is tech (the newer Audex line features Bluetooth). Many other jackets come with holes for headphones, including my six-year-old daughter’s jacket from LL Bean. I don’t know if these companies are at risk for violating a patent, but I confess I use my pockets for DualAccess; to access my keys and a quick interior adjustment of the vanilla love log.

The truth is you can’t even stop a 3-year-old from creating patentable high technology. My youngest daughter recently developed CouchCache – I’m not talking about loose change left behind by friends, I’m talking about access to real hidden treasures such as Fruit Loops and Barbie Dolls. Rip in the slip cover, I think not – CouchCache homie.

Wearable technology has a lot more to offer than DualAccess, BadgeGrabber and No-Bulge Pockets. I’ve no doubt clothes will get smarter, control body temp, report vitals (heart, pulse), better resist odor, etc. But Hat Holder?

Reading Time: < 1 minute

Hammer SickleDear Sergey, Eugene, Dmitry, Aleksandr; with a bunch of 15 letter last names I can’t pronounce (and I’m 50% Russian myself)!

Thank you for your hard work restoring Bitness. You faithfully ran FSCK over and over and again with the brute force of ignorance, even though disk integrity had nothing to do with the problem.

You decided – during the brief glimpse that the server was actually up for 5 minutes – to take it back down again, during working hours, to install more RAM. Because everyone knows throwing more RAM at a downed server is like throwing a life saver to a drowning shipmate.

Instead of having a logical failover plan in place you created more work for yourselves and more aggravation for both you and your clients, incurring more in labor costs, credits and lost business than what it would take to mirror the server multiple times.

When I asked why you don’t have failover and backup systems in place you said, “I don’t pay enough to have that kind of service.” Kudos comrades, for adding insult to injury.

Thank you, comrades, for night after aggravating night of not being able to share bitness.com with all the people I know and unfortunately emailed the night before promoting the site.

Spasiba and dah sveedahnyah.

Reading Time: 2 minutes

My neighbors asked me to take their trash to the curb while they’re away on vacation. This family generates more trash in a week than we can in months. I opened their garage door and it was like a portal to Mexico City. A small Mexican boy came out from under the BMW and tried to sell me Chicklets and shine my ‘zapatas.’

Recycle

It’s time for Bitness to step on to the soap box and make a public service address: RECYCLE. For starters consider used equipment and what to do with those funky Nikes colonizing in the back of your closet…

Gym Equipment: Here in SE New England we have Big Fitness. I’ve went to the one in Pawtucket, RI and they have a TON of used commercial equipment like treadmills, stair climbers, ellipticals, bikes, weight equipment, etc, etc. Often times what you purchase can be financed, offers a warranty and includes delivery. Check your local listings to find a similar business in your area.

Running Shoes: Runners can get attached to their shoes after logging so many miles together. Maybe you set a PR in your lucky Adidas, or if you’re like me, perhaps you’ve pledged your life to your shoes if only they can get you home from the bowels of some unknown wilderness area. A site called Run The Planet has a decent collection of links for recycling your shoes. Put your old running shoes on the feet of needy children in some of the world’s poorest places, or have them recycled to athletic surfaces (running tracks).

There are other ways fitness geeks can help save the planet, including sock puppets, rechargeable batteries and filtered water bottles for starters.

Do your part, support recycling.

Reading Time: < 1 minute

I can’t even get my friends to regularly visit Bitness, let alone total strangers who share an interest in fitness and gadgets. Would I like this thing to explode and write 7 days-a-week about all things technology and fitness? Hell yes!

I’m not ready to give up on my dream but I do need people to spread the word. If you happened upon this site, please leave a comment and let me know how you got here and feel free to provide suggestions.

The day job can be a drag, but there are worse gigs. Visit the site – often – click on the ads, give me some feedback. Keep Hope Alive!

Reading Time: < 1 minute

The sub-title to Bitness.com is The Fit Geek. So I Googled it and yes, it would have been a good idea to do that PRIOR to choosing it but it seems so random no? Is anything original anymore? My primary goal with Bitness is to turn geeks on to gadgets for their given sport or exercise of choice.

Here are some sites for the fit geek and why Bitness is better 😉

Geek Fit – Do these guys look fit to you? Well maybe not but they are committed to what they do and Jason and his wife are on the fitness path. Best of luck to them.

Fikgeek.org – Not sure this site has a following, but the pharmaceutical and ring tone spammers sure do like to comment. Like Geek Fit, FitGeek recently wrote about Traineo, a motivational site to help users stick to weight loss and fitness goals. This is done by grouping with 4 other Traineo users and driving one another to reach each others goals. Bitness is 100% ring tone and Viagra free.

Fit ‘Geeks of the Week’ at Oxford apparently eat Bic pens as part of their regimen. I’ve not tried this personally, but they seem to have a healthy glow and seem rather pleased with themselves. Here at Bitness HQ we don’t eat our Bic pens, we use them to open the Kryptonite locks on our bikes to get out and hammer.